And There’s No Vacancy At The Island of Misfit Toys
by Normandy D. Piccolo
“Emo! Freak! Weirdo! Reject! Nobody likes you! Nobody wants you! You don’t belong! Why are you still here?”, the bully and his cohorts shout out, while hurling empty soda cans and catapulting spit balls at the pale boy dressed in all black, who calls himself, Kram (Mark spelled backwards).
Kram, a sensitive, kind soul, quickly finds solace, hiding in the darkness behind a set of stairs, before the bullies can witness a steady stream of painful salty tears, certain to wash away the black make-up, placed heavily underneath his blue eyes. He sits down, pulls out his private journal and scribbles down a bully laced message...
While I despise your cruel objections
And wish to initiate identical subjections
For you to feel your own hate-fueled injections
My thoughts now dwell on various life ejections...
Live. Die. Live. Die. Live. Die. Live. Die. Live. Die.
Your relentless cruelty has made this choice an obsession.
Which one I’ll choose matters not...because according to you
My existence is that of a faceless reflection....
In order to survive in life, humans require three basic things; Food. Shelter. And Love. Without food we’d starve. Without shelter we’d perish in the weather. And without love we’d feel rejected, lonely and sad.
According to the Bible, “It is not good that Man should be alone” (Genesis 2:18) I don’t believe a person would feel such unbearable pain upon rejection and isolation from his or her peers if that weren’t the case. But in order to get love, we have to first give love...to ourselves. I will expand further on this topic towards the end. First let’s look at rejection.
Rejection is one of the worst things one human being can do to another. In Sociology 101, Professors teach the importance of belonging, of being accepted within your species. A human being wants to be accepted by other human beings. Race, sex, sexual orientation, social standing, etc... matter not. It’s about being included, belonging, fitting in somewhere. Somehow. Someway. Again it goes back to how we were made - not to be alone.
We are made to believe that if you don’t fit in with a group, if you aren’t popular there must be something wrong with you. In other words, you are a rejected product and should therefore are ordered to reside on The Island of Misfit toys with the polka dotted elephant, the train with square wheels, the airplane that can’t fly and Dolly, the rag doll who always feels abandoned and unloved.
When a person, no matter what their age, faces harsh rejection, bullying, by his or her peers, the fall-out can sometimes be very detrimental. Some people never fully recover and carry painful scars inside with them for the rest of their lives. Some, unable to live with the pain, end their life.
When someone is rejected by their peers, before long they become fixated upon their hair (color, style, length, texture), make-up (too heavy, too dark, wrong color), clothes, body shape, weight, height, eye color, nose formation, how your lips look - too skinny? Too plump? The sound of their voice becomes an issue. The list goes on and on, but they basically tear themselves down and apart like vultures on a carcass because they weren’t deemed acceptable enough in someone else’s eyes. It becomes an obsession that wears them down second by second.
STOP! DON’T CRITICIZE ANYTHING ABOUT YOURSELF, EVER AGAIN! And tune out anything negative anyone has to say about you. This is wrong thinking. Nobody is perfect. We all have faults and mess up sometimes...but if you are not careful, if you keep absorbing the negative bullying, it can become the foundation from which a bully will continue to build upon. The bully will use those negative feelings you have about yourself to smash you into the ground until there is nothing left but a pile of dirt with a bouquet of flowers on top with a note that reads; I Miss You. I Wish You Were Still Here.
Burn this into your thoughts so that it never leaves; “There is no one else on the planet like you. You were made perfect, just the way you are”.
Instead of allowing another to tear you down and make fun of your uniqueness, embrace it. Love yourself. Accept yourself. And never let a bully get you so low that you want to end your life. You have the power to make that NOT HAPPEN. YOU HAVE THE POWER! Stop giving a rip about what bad stuff someone else thinks of you and start focusing on what you think of yourself. Focus on the good stuff.
If a bully says, “You’re fat.”...Say, “No. I’m perfectly made.”
If a bully says, “You’re dumb.”....Say “No I’m perfectly smart.”
Got the idea? For everything negative a bully says, flip it to something positive.
Listen, before you can expect anyone to love or accept you, you have to first love and accept yourself.
Finally, be a friend to someone who you think may be alone, may be feeling rejected, unwanted, unloved. You never know...your gesture of kindness could be their last life line. Six words can mean a lot to someone in pain. “I am here. I love you.”
If you have a bully or bullycide story you would like to share and possibly be featured in this blog, please contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org. No attachments or embedded images please. My book, Bullycide: To Whom It Concerns is available now at Amazon.
I Luv U!
Do Not Let A Bully Win.